Habit #5—Seek first to understand
Commitment to Habit # 5—Seek First to Understand, then to be understood (the habit of listening)
Listening is not something I do well, and although I have tried to improve this skill, I have not been successful. I constantly find myself interrupting, relating what the other person is saying to my own experiences, or trying to offer advice. I've tried rephrasing the content, but people who know me well think there is something wrong. I'm not sure why I'm not a good listener. Maybe because I was an only child. Anyway, I think if I focus on the emotions that lie behind what is being told to me and reflect on the meaning or feeling, listening might come more nature.
- Reflect Feeling
- Reflect Meaning
- Use Empathetic starters
How I plan to teach habit #5 to others:
2. When was the last time they did this?
3. Teach the steps of empathetic listening.
4. Have them check how they react to people during their next ten encounters. Are they responding too quickly, are they being judgement, giving advice without being asked, interrupting, or are they really listening? Assess where they are at.
5. Have students practice with three to five other people they encounter and report back on their progress.
Covey, Stephen (1989). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Person Change.